Wael used to say to me "You are the only one I have this problem with."
Yep. Because you don't show your true self to other people.
Only the ones closest in relationship and proximity are the lucky ones to see the abusive side.
It is a personality disorder. A person with an uncontrollable mental illness would be equally abusive with other people in their lives and not just target one person. With NPD the target victim is used as the virtual punching bag because THEY feel so horrible about themselves. It is completely controlled by the mask they show to the outside world. I don't buy into the belief that they don't know what they are doing and it is "unintentional". In my case, Wael knew he had this problem. He chose not to address it in the proper way and he chose to deny the reality. NPD/BPD believe their reality is the only one that exists. Seeing another person standing in front of them does nothing to shed light on the truth of their actions and behavior.
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