that moment of realization when

You realize that you wrote a love letter to your husband in the first few weeks of your relationship and he twisted your words and threw them in your face at every chance he got even at times it was NOT relevant to the situation at hand, yet anytime you tried to give him concrete examples of something he said or did that hurt you he told you to "stop living in the past" "stop bringing up the past" or "that is ancient history".  You realize you were dealing with a selfish, self centered narcissist who could not take what he dished out.